February 2019
Starting on new medication threw me from a loop. Starting on any medication was rough. I had always been the "naturalist" when it came to medication. If there was something from nature that could work just as well, I would do so. Food, herbs, spices, etc were my go-to for almost anything. I did take acetaminophen when pain came calling (because it is the only pain killer that I can take without having too many side effects).
The Nurse Practitioner and I did not get along at first. She didn't speak to me, she spoke to her computer. Literally. She came in the first time we met, introduced herself and then never glanced at me again. She talked the entire time with her face glued to her computer screen.
I. Was. Not. Happy. Not at all. Here I am, trying to navigate the health care system for the first time (which I had taken great pains to try and avoid) and I'm scared and new and nervous; and all she did was stare at her screen and ask questions and tell me things I already knew. Yeah. Not happy Me sat there through the 25 minutes only answering her in short phrases and watching to see if she would meet me eye to eye.
Nope.
She wanted to start me on the strongest stuff that they had available at the time; not even taking into consideration what I had asked at the beginning if there was a way to try and control this with as little medication as possible & seeing a dietitian. I don't think she listened to me because she sent a very strong prescription to the local pharmacy and told me to start that as soon as I could. She stood up, finally looked at me, and asked if I had any more questions. I just shook my head and she opened the door and waited for me to collect my things, walked me to the front door, and then left me with the receptionist. Luckily the receptionist could see that I was a bit overwhelmed with everything, so she squeezed my hand, said she'd call later to set up the next 2 week appointment in a few days once I'd had time to process everything, and asked if I needed someone to walk with me to my vehicle. I shook my head again, afraid that if I spoke, the emotion I was trying to keep in check in public would spill, gave her a thumbs up, & walked out.
I walked out of there feeling mentally drained. I sat in my car and cried in the parking lot. I'm not really a crier, so that made me feel even more like a fool, which made me embarrassed, and caused even more tears. I was a mess.
I had a follow up with my Primary Care team and told them my concerns. I've known my PC team for a while and they know that when I schedule something or ask to seem them, it's pretty bad. Remember, I was the person who rarely went to the doctor because I did everything I could to avoid him. While sitting in the room chatting to my PC Nurse (who we do call a family friend), it all came spilling out. More tears, more "drama" from me. My PC Doc came in while I was just letting it all out, and luckily he listened. He listened and he actually started getting rather annoyed that another doctor & nurse team would treat someone like that.
The next day I received a call in the afternoon from my PC team saying that they were setting up a time for me to go see that NP and the guy that did my scope again. "This time things would be different," was the phrase I was told. So a week later, I walked into that office again (this time with my mum--because I didn't want to face that all again by myself) and it was like night and day. The NP came in, said hello again, asked a couple of questions, then sat to the side of her computer and started actually seeing me and seeing how uncomfortable I was and actually listened. My mum and I were kind of taken back by the 180 turn-around.
The appointment lasted for about 25 minutes and I won't bore you with details. But suffice to say, I left feeling a little better. The NP had agreed to start me on a low dose of a low/mid medicine and allow me to see if I could lower things on my own with diet and other research I was doing. I didn't start taking the medication until near the end of the month/beginning of March, but I did meet with the dietitian they recommended.
That did not go over well either.
The Nurse Practitioner and I did not get along at first. She didn't speak to me, she spoke to her computer. Literally. She came in the first time we met, introduced herself and then never glanced at me again. She talked the entire time with her face glued to her computer screen.
I. Was. Not. Happy. Not at all. Here I am, trying to navigate the health care system for the first time (which I had taken great pains to try and avoid) and I'm scared and new and nervous; and all she did was stare at her screen and ask questions and tell me things I already knew. Yeah. Not happy Me sat there through the 25 minutes only answering her in short phrases and watching to see if she would meet me eye to eye.
Nope.
She wanted to start me on the strongest stuff that they had available at the time; not even taking into consideration what I had asked at the beginning if there was a way to try and control this with as little medication as possible & seeing a dietitian. I don't think she listened to me because she sent a very strong prescription to the local pharmacy and told me to start that as soon as I could. She stood up, finally looked at me, and asked if I had any more questions. I just shook my head and she opened the door and waited for me to collect my things, walked me to the front door, and then left me with the receptionist. Luckily the receptionist could see that I was a bit overwhelmed with everything, so she squeezed my hand, said she'd call later to set up the next 2 week appointment in a few days once I'd had time to process everything, and asked if I needed someone to walk with me to my vehicle. I shook my head again, afraid that if I spoke, the emotion I was trying to keep in check in public would spill, gave her a thumbs up, & walked out.
I walked out of there feeling mentally drained. I sat in my car and cried in the parking lot. I'm not really a crier, so that made me feel even more like a fool, which made me embarrassed, and caused even more tears. I was a mess.
I had a follow up with my Primary Care team and told them my concerns. I've known my PC team for a while and they know that when I schedule something or ask to seem them, it's pretty bad. Remember, I was the person who rarely went to the doctor because I did everything I could to avoid him. While sitting in the room chatting to my PC Nurse (who we do call a family friend), it all came spilling out. More tears, more "drama" from me. My PC Doc came in while I was just letting it all out, and luckily he listened. He listened and he actually started getting rather annoyed that another doctor & nurse team would treat someone like that.
The next day I received a call in the afternoon from my PC team saying that they were setting up a time for me to go see that NP and the guy that did my scope again. "This time things would be different," was the phrase I was told. So a week later, I walked into that office again (this time with my mum--because I didn't want to face that all again by myself) and it was like night and day. The NP came in, said hello again, asked a couple of questions, then sat to the side of her computer and started actually seeing me and seeing how uncomfortable I was and actually listened. My mum and I were kind of taken back by the 180 turn-around.
The appointment lasted for about 25 minutes and I won't bore you with details. But suffice to say, I left feeling a little better. The NP had agreed to start me on a low dose of a low/mid medicine and allow me to see if I could lower things on my own with diet and other research I was doing. I didn't start taking the medication until near the end of the month/beginning of March, but I did meet with the dietitian they recommended.
That did not go over well either.
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